Marcelina Balahadia Goeller
~Strength through Challenges~
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Copa: Where are you from?
Marcy: I was born in the Philippines, the 11th child of my parents, Mr. Zacaria Balahadia and Mrs. Anquilina Rivera. One of my brothers passed away when he was only 3 months old, and my Father was accidentally shot and died seven months after I was born. My oldest brother, Domingo, was 23 when I was born. My closest sister, Conssuela (Chit), was two years older than I was. Because my Mom could not breastfeed me and we had little money, I was fed what was available. As would be expected, this impacted my immune system and had negative impacts on my bones. Thanks to American dentists, I have a beautiful smile that requires regular care. I also took daily injections for two years to help my osteoporosis. God Bless my husband, Tom’s military Tricare, as the cost is over $4,800 every 28 days. We grew up in town and owned a farm, spending most of our days working on it. We had no indoor plumbing or electricity in our home or on the farm, and learned to love the freedom of farm living. Yes, we studied by candlelight. Copa: Please tell us more about your childhood: Marcy: Both Chit and I worked hard at school, and both managed to be the only siblings to go to college. To help pay expenses, I lived in my sister-in-law's house. I helped with chores to get my board free. After obtaining my Associate Secretary degree, I worked in office training at Delta Motors and then JP Industrial Sales. Copa: What happened after your training at Delta and JP Industrial?
Marcy: Here I met my first husband, Arturo Adarlo. He encouraged me to continue my college desires, so I earned my Bachelor’s Degree in Science Education at Adamson University. I taught at St. Mary’s Academy and Blessed Elena Academy. We were blessed with two children, Erwin and Sharon, and then he was transferred to San Francisco, working as the sound engineer for ABC. We were separated for 3 years as I was not permitted to travel with him. I tried to visit him but was denied a Visa twice by the US. Embassy. 
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Copa: How did you eventually get to the United States?
Marcy: Things got interesting when my Sister in Law “helped me” by arranging an attorney for me to get to the United States. I paid 100,000 pesos (at the time, a good annual salary was 4,000 pesos). My husband was from a very respectable and reasonably well-to-do family. I was very naive, but I’m still here, and what happened is all in the past. My trip to the US was through Japan, Canada, and Mexico. In Mexico, my luggage was taken from me, and we traveled by motorcycles (yes, me, Erwin, and Sharon) over mountains and slept under the stars. It was challenging to make sure we were not abused or separated. The end of the trip was through US Customs at Tijuana, where I was stowed in a box under the back seat. Helps to be under 100 pounds. Somehow, we were let into the country even as Sharon was crying for her Mother. Yes, I entered the US in 1984 as an illegal alien. We had our third child, Mark in 1984. I taught Sunday School and was a member of the Choir at Daly City United Methodist Church during my time in San Francisco. In 1987, my first husband, Arturo, died of cardiac arrest in his sleep. After dealing with the loss of my husband, my sister Chit invited us to live in Virginia with her family. After a few months, I used some of the life insurance money to put a down payment on my home in Burke, Virginia, which I still have. From that time until 2021, I worked for over 25 years teaching preschools throughout Fairfax County. I earned several awards, such as Teacher of the Year. I was the Educational Coordinator for LaPetite Academy and 7-Corners Children’s School and was in charge of leading all teachers in writing student evaluations and being present at all Parent/Teacher meetings. Teaching and working with parents started my desire to strongly request parents and other teachers to make sure they were involved with the students to better ensure their success in life. Things got interesting when my Sister in Law “helped me” by arranging an attorney for me to get to the United States. I paid 100,000 pesos (at the time, a good annual salary was 4,000 pesos). My husband was from a very respectable and reasonably well-to-do family. I was very naive but I’m still here, and what happened is all in the past.
My trip to the US was through Japan, Canada, and Mexico. In Mexico, my luggage was taken from me, and we traveled by motorcycles (yes, me, Erwin, and Sharon) over mountains and slept under the stars. It was challenging to make sure we were not abused or separated. The end of the trip was through US Customs at Tijuana, where I was stowed in a box under the back seat. Helps to be under 100 pounds. Somehow, we were let into the country even as Sharon was crying for her Mother. Yes, I entered the US in 1984 as an illegal alien. We had our third child, Mark in 1984. I taught Sunday School and was a member of the Choir at Daly City United Methodist Church during my time in San Francisco. In 1987, my first husband, Arturo, died of cardiac arrest in his sleep. After dealing with the loss of my husband, my sister Chit invited us to live in Virginia with her family. After a few months, I used some of the life insurance money to put a down payment on my home in Burke, Virginia, which I still have. From that time until 2021, I worked for over 25 years in teaching preschools throughout Fairfax County. I earned several awards, such as Teacher of the Year. I was the Educational Coordinator for LaPetite Academy and 7-Corners Children’s School and was in charge of leading all teachers in writing student evaluations and being present at all Parent/Teacher meetings. Teaching and working with parents started my desire to strongly request parents and other teachers to make sure they were involved with the students to better ensure their success in life. After completing over 100 hours of Wolf Trap Institute for Early Learning Through the Arts, I was recruited and worked for the Wolf Trap Artist Program, putting on workshops, training preschool teachers on how to produce and perform educational shows at their schools. Although I was never a full-time teacher with Fairfax Public Schools, I still completed over 161 training hours with Fairfax County Office for Children, 53 hours with High School Educational Research Foundation, and 43 hours with other County programs to include hours with Social Services/Penn State Extension in Child Abuse and Neglect; Recognition, Reporting and Responding for Educators. Outside my teaching career, I am very involved in Springfield United Methodist Church. In addition to being in the Choir and soloing often, I was a Preschool Sunday School Teacher, Nursery Coordinator, and assistant for Children’s Choir for over 10 years. As a member of sandwich ministry, we continue to make over 500 sandwiches and deliver to homeless each week. I am very thankful to the church members who assisted me in not being deported at one point. I met my second husband, David Fernandez, a divorcee, not long after moving into my Virginia home. In short, he was good man when he was good but he could not control his temper. My children desperately asked me to separate from him because of his verbal and very physical abuse. We had a child, Daniel in 1988. In 2001 my daughter, Sharon, married my step-son, David Jr. David Jr. became very close to my other first marriage children, Erwin and Mark, and they all get together great. David Jr. and David Sr. were instrumental in my obtaining my green card and eventually my US Citizenship. My religious background, challenging upbringing, and wanting to keep the family together would not let me leave David Sr. In 2015 David Sr. had an extensive stroke, quickly becoming handicapped. For over four years I took care of him while working and assisting in taking care of a grandchild. He passed away January 2020 and I continued to work through May 2021 when I met my third husband, Tom. Tom was also a widower as his wife died April 2020. Tom knew I was right for him as I comforted his two grandchildren during our third date, a trip to Busch Gardens with his son, wife, and two grandchildren. On the way home the children started crying uncontrollably and their mother and father were unable to calm them. I held them close, talked to them, and they quieted down and fell asleep. We currently enjoy going to Tom’s nine, and my one grandchildren’s events to continue to show our support to help ensure their success. Tom wanted to travel and have a vacation home in Florida so I retired. We married May 2022. After our marriage, my sister Chit’s husband, Victorio, and I helped Tom prepare his house for sale that sold fall of 2023. In January 2024 we bought a home in Florida where we currently snow bird from my Burke Virginia home. During my time with Tom, he supports me by attending almost all of the Filipino events and we often assist in sponsoring the charitable events. We are also members of Alexandria Asian American Lion’s Club that we provide monthly support. During 2023 I referred and sponsored my niece, Evelyn Clough to compete in the 2023 Mrs Tourism USA Pageant. I enjoyed working hard, coordinating with my other nieces, Virgie Whitesell and Madona Williams, to support Evelyn who eventually won the 2023 Mrs Tourism USA. Through my challenging years growing up, to dealing with my second husband, I fully understand and appreciate the support of family and teachers. These experiences gave me unique understanding and empathy towards others who may be going through similar experiences of low income, inadequate health support, being teased and bullied, death of loved ones, and abuse. I survived and persisted in order to raise four successful children, putting them through college, own two homes, and can live comfortably on our retirement. Believing God looks after me, regardless of the challenges, is what carries me through each day. During my teaching career I assisted many students and worked with their parents to help increase their support of their children. Now it is my turn to use Mrs. America Tourism as my springboard to encourage parents and teachers to make sure no child is left behind. Their involvement is key to the child’s success. And, don’t just think of your child, look at others. Remember, the ignored or left behind child could be an issue in the future. Paraphrasing John F. Kennedy, “ask not what your community can do for your child, ask what you can do to support yours and other children.” |
