"Finding Yourself After Being Lost in Someone Else"
By Bob Paff
For better or worse, in sickness and in health, til death do us part!
What happens when this Fairy Tale does not end happily? We give our time, commitment and years to our significant others, only to have the majority of those relationships end in bitterness, sadness and regret. After the dust has settled, how do we mend our broken hearts and picked up the pieces of these failed relationships?
We start by doing an "autopsy" of the relationship and what went wrong. While it does take 2 to end a relationship, my personal experience is that one contributes more to the demise than another. The ways are numerous that things unravel and fall apart, this we know.
However, picking ourselves up after the end, finding ourselves again, discovering what we've surrendered, lost or denied, is solely our responsibility.
We must be willing to go deep within ourselves by being brutally honest about how and why things happened. Those who do not learn from their mistakes, will certainly repeat them. It's the single reason that the more marriages one has, the higher the rate of failure!
Spend the time you need, alone, in therapy, in prayer, what ever works for you and gives you time and space to heal. While being alone is hard, and doing the emotional heavy lifting is almost too much to bare for some folks, the work must be done.
Along the way, you, just as I have done, will find your joy, your peace, your spirit and your passion. Only then are we truly able to Find Ourselves After Being Lost in Someone Else!